Friday, March 12, 2010

Confused


So I thought I was so ready to see Michael and discuss this relationship thang but now that he's ready to talk... I'm not so sure... I still love him but I'm falling for R too.. so its hella irritating and confusing... I mean I know I will never go back to Michael but I'm scared that if I meet up with him then I'll b face to face with my best friend again... face to face with three years of happiness, pain, sadness, and misery.  I really don't know if I'm ready to face the beautiful nightmare again. On the other side there's R who each day I'm getting more and more attached to. I know he cares about me but this attachment is an illness... like I love waking up right next to him and laying my head on his chest til I fall asleep. I love talking to him because I feel that I can talk to him about almost anything. Whenever I'm feeling down he makes me feel better.. but everyone has flaws... I heard from a few people that he's the jealous type... kinda bothers me because that's how Michael was and I forsure don't want that... honestly I'm hella confused and it's hella been bothering me:  -(

2 comments:

Nita said...

nice expression, "his attachment is an illness" and if Michael is your best friend then dont you ever let that go! it has to be more than friendship for a relationship! if you feel you have more than a friendship with Michael then pursue where you left off...it only helps to atleast think about that...on the other hand...the real nightmare is a relationship with a man with a double life...and "He's okay with that" honey, don't sell yourself short! Im so sick uh that cat and I dont even date him, lol, blossom and have fun this spring break girl, RANDY FREE! lol

Love Jay said...

Michael was my best friend until he became abusive. I am beautiful and I looked horrible with a black eye or bruise every other day.. Michael told me.. the only way we will work is if i "listen to what the fuck he has to say and stop tyrna think for myself".. a big fuckin NO